The Grand Computer Theft

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From Paddy Rolling Stone (PRS) forum:

Question: “A question for Ste and Paul McGuinness: Would you care to tell the good people of this forum the real reason the Popes are barred from the Boogaloo???”

Answer: “You will be able to ask Paul yourself soon!!!”

Question: “Why's that? Have they nicked someones P.C.?”


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Not yet. But preparations for the operation are in process. Shane will cover their backs. They learnt that bastards kept slagging them in the virtual space, so they decided it was time for a good reply...

Will they steal a PC from some poor old helpless citizen?

Nah! It has to be a huge store. They must have an opportunity to chose the best PC.

The most nice-looking one? With Irish countryside on the screensaver and a nice mouse resembling a real rodent. Or how else are they going to recognize a good PC?!

The biggest one!!!

The biggest PC, the biggest monitor, the biggest keyboard... How will they be able to carry everything? Are they are body-builders or what?!

They have roadies, well-trained roadies.

It started as a quiet small operation, and now it’s turning into the Grand Computer Theft...

Yes! And then the IRA will be blamed!!! Experts from MI5 will decide the IRA is planning to to crack Pentagon system and drop nuclear bomb on London.

The IRA will be blamed, Brits will declare the state of emergency... and Shane and Co. will be sitting there, wondering what cable to put where?

They have roadies!!! Experts! Who know that each cable has a fitting hole. Actually everybody knows about the existence of fitting holes... it 's the main postulate of modern philosophy.

Okay, okay. And then what? Storming PRS?

Nah. Surfing porn sites. Boys get on the internet for the first time! So they will remember about explaining the real reasons and telling the truth to fans only in a month...

And their machine will be so full of viruses from porn sites by that time that it will take them another month to get it fixed....

Yes! It means we will never learn the truth!!! So they risked for nothing...

Only caused an international scandal. They should repent by giving the comp to a beggar on the street.

A group of beggars: one will get monitor, another one modem...

And their little child will get the mouse. And a tourist passing by will notice it, take a photo, sell it to The Sun, make a heap of money, and Shane will gain great publicity. A happy ending!

And MI5 will begin their own investigation, they will discover that it's the same comp that was stolen months ago by the IRA, and they will realise that the Irish Treasure and punk legend is closely connected to the IRA hackers!!!

Even better publicity if the word gets out.

Aha, like Guildford Four... Now there will be about ten suspects!!!

Guilford Four, Birmingham Six, London Ten.... A clear proof that the IRA is gaining strength!

Yes!!
© MacRua, Zuzana, 2005
photo © unknown